Battle reports are for people who remember to make them.

Got a game in last night and tried a few new things. Lets look at lessons learned.

Deathclock! 

Wrong Deathclock. 

More accurate. Less blood.

Deathclock is an amazing mechanic that prevents my turns from taking so long that Keanu Reeves ages while I play.  Every time its your turn the clock ticks down. When you are done you hit the button and your opponent's clock begins to drain. We set it to 45 minutes a player since we are used to taking forever on 35 points. It made me actively think about what I was going to do and also forced me to just do things to try in win the game instead of my typical holding the line and hoping they make a mistake. Also gave me more time in my night to do other things like watch this kickass documentary about Zanzibar.

This guy is hilariously creepy.

Legion. Why didnt I continue with them? So I was rocking a pretty weird legion list last night. I had a Scythean, Carnivean, Warmongers, Warmonger War Chief War man warrior, some Warspears and UA. All Under Rhyas. I had a great time abusing forests. Setting up the Ogrun units on the objective as my anvil, I was able to park my beasts in a forest on the flank, nonchargeable, just waiting to spring out and gnaw face. Worked perfectly at taking down that piece of shit Bronzeback. Sent that fucker back to the circus. Seriously a bitch move on my part but the 5-0 win on objective was a consolation to my pride.I am sure Zach will post his thoughts on the game. We will be playing Friday and will post a battle report complete with some sort of picture graphic thing in color. Until then, here is the table at the end of the game when we realized we forgot to write up the game.

And not a single painted model by me. The black primer was perfect camo in the objective.

Ambition is Success' Aunt's Friend

So James has been talking about me so I figured I should say something so people don't think he has an imaginary friend or something. Anyway I started with Circle, learning to be tricksy, then Retribution, filling myself with hate for all non pointy ears and from there I went to Skorne to learn hate for all things. So right now I'm really on a Skorne kick anyway. High armor, deceptively fast, and I really like the beasts.

So without further ado, here is the focus of my next project! If he was in a band he'd be the drummer, throwing down 3 explosions a turn for Skorne to march to.... THE MAMMOTH

Progress report in a few days!

Update for the person who reads this

Just thought I should post a little update here: This weekend I had 0 time to do anything. I was sad. I cried. A lot. I had to go do things and be social or something. Tomorrow, however, will be the epic throwdown between me and my mortal enemy, Zach. Zach is the tekken whatever contributor. We will write up battle reports, each describing our thoughts on our turns. Mine may be blank. I'm not much of a thinker. We will post pictures and it will be cool. Everyone will be happy. So fear not! I have not abandoned this blog so early in its life. Just sort of left it in the car in the middle of summer with the windows rolled up.

Miserable Meat Mountain

Ok well for my first real post I have for you my current project. These beauties here are Trollkin Warders. A key component in the "Miserable Meat Mountain". They essentially stand there, look pretty and get hit.

With mugs like that how could you not take a swing? As you can see they are in various stages in painting. These dudes are huge and kind of a pain in the ass to cover with paint. I am using a vallejo Falcon Turquise as the basecoat for the skin. Then the P3 Radiant Platinum for the base of the armor. Basic green for the beginning of the tartened cloth. Seriously, each guy alone is a fucking project. The unit is like a god damn life goal. I feel like the trollbloods army should come with a warning for anyone lacking an airbrush. 

So where are they going? Here are some of my other trolls to give you an idea as to their direction. 

 

If you want to actually see the damn things, they will be in my gallery. 

The big plan for these dudes is going to be including them in an army stacked with high armour, multiwound infantry that will just be an absolute bitch to chew through. Hitting them is no issue but checking any damage boxes will be the trick. These guys can hold objectives like a champ which is weird because the trollkin champions arent nearly as good at it. 

Anyway, a lot of work ahead of me so this should be done by the time a new Duke Nukem game is out. 

The Plunge

So I like to sit around a click on random crap instead of being constructive. I have hundreds of dollars worth of models waiting to be built and painted and yet I am still here clicking away on imgur hoping to find that one fucking cat picture that somehow brings absolute meaning to my life. So lets knock that off. I wanted to start a blog and maybe talk about my current projects, what I am excited about, and how my games are going in the realm of miniature war gaming.

Spoilers: Its mostly WarmaHordes.

I want to do this not only to keep myself accountable for projects but also to share information and enthusiasm about the hobby. I plan to post pictures of whatever I am working on and maybe throw up some gritty battle reports.  I know there are million awesome blogs and forums out there on the topic, and I think you should go to them. These include handcannononline, reddit.com/r/warmachine, or even chain-attack.com if you're willing to slum it up. What you will find here wont be anything profound but maybe more of a familiar view of the hobby. I dont do this proffessionally, obviously. I mean, look at the fucking page. It's terrible. Id be broke if I relied on this kind of stuff for a living. I am a programmer. So read it, or dont, but I am hoping this is a venue in which we all can laugh about how much we suck at the hobby we love so much.


-James